|
Questions
(Quotes
from Ed in Red)
|
Answers |
|
Sat, 10 Jun 2006
William Arthur Ward
Hi Ed,
Just want to share these thoughts from William Arthur Ward which helps
me find success in trading and in life.
Thank you for your website and the insights it offers.
-----
To laugh is to risk appearing a fool,
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental
To reach out to another is to risk involvement,
To expose feelings is to risk exposing your true self
To place your ideas and dreams before a crowd is to
risk their loss
To love is to risk not being loved in return,
To hope is to risk despair,
To try is to risk to failure.
But risks must be taken
because the greatest hazard in life
is to risk nothing.
The person who risks nothing,
does nothing, has nothing
is nothing.
He may avoid suffering and sorrow,
But he cannot learn, feel, change, grow or live.
Chained by his servitude he is a slave
who has forfeited all freedom.
Only a person who risks is free.
The pessimist complains about the wind;
The optimist expects it to change;
And the realist adjusts the sails.
- William Arthur Ward |
One of my favorites, applicable to
TTP is:
When
we seek to discover
the
best in others,
we
somehow
bring out the best
in
ourselves.

William Arthur Ward (1921 - 1994)
Photo circa 1961 (age 40)
Ward, an American, author, editor, pastor, teacher and
assistant to the President of Texas Wesleyan University is a prolific
creator of motivating epigrams.
Clip:
http://www.txwes.edu/communications/
documents/TWMagFall2003final.pdf |
|
Thu, 8 Jun
2006
Trend
Hi Ed,
What are good ways to define trend and measure trend strength?
Thanks.
|
A trend is a general
direction. Trend value depends on how you define it and compute
it. "The" trend does not exist - so there are no good or bad ways
to compute "it."

The Trend May Be This Way or That Way
depending on how far you look.
Clip:
http://www.3dgo.org/path.jpg
|
|
Thu, 8 Jun
2006
Run Away
Wife
I take the hot seat about unresolved issues with my wife. She seems to
run away and not want to resolve anything. I notice that this makes me
yawn and makes me tired.
I get into the form of yawning and fully experiencing yawning. I also
feel bored and fold that in along with yawning. I realize that I feel
complete exhaustion and I recall feeling this same feeling during
disagreements with my parents.
I realize that it is about acceptance, my reluctance to accept my
wife and/or parents and their reluctance to accept me.
The process manager asks me if I know what my wife feels when we argue,
and I do. He asks me if I am willing to experience her feelings. I do
and I realize that she feels extreme tension in her neck and sick to her
stomach and it is really hard to stay in that form. I do not like the
feeling and now realize why she runs away.
I understand how she feels and I work through her feelings until I like
the way she feels. I understand it and I am ok with it. I am willing
to accept her the
way she is. |
Thank you for sharing your process.

Accepting a Run-Away Wife
may involve
running with her.
Clip:
http://www.podiatry.curtin.edu.au/
encyclopedia/running/ |
|
Wed, 7 Jun
2006
Visit to Incline Village Trading Tribe
Hi Ed,
Coming to Incline, I am not quiet sure what to expect. I feel a strong
sense of curiosity to meet the IV tribe and to see what Ed is all about.
At the meeting I am very impressed how committed everyone is to support
each other. The IV tribe feels like a family. (Thanks to the entire
tribe for letting me be part of your group that night). I find
inspiration in how committed everyone is to the process.
A very deep issue comes up for me that night. I forget my documentation
of my commitments, and therefore am unprepared for the snapshot
process. My face gets hot and my hands get tingly. Ed says chances are
this is an important feeling for me and I might want to take that into
the tribe later on that night.
On the hotseat I recall that feeling, it soon merges into different
forms, until finally I get to the big one. I have this intense feeling
of suffocation in my throat. The more I intensify this feeling, the more
I get scared I might actually die doing this form.
Ed encourages me to also experience that fear. I do that
and really get into my fear form. After a while the fear disappears and
I get into the suffocation form again. Out of a sudden it loses it's
intensity. At that point I am not sure if I resolved the form all the
way or if I have more to do. I know I did as much that night as I was
willing to do. The tribe asks me a few provoking questions about
commitments and I feel this tingling in my stomach. I go with that one
and it is pretty easy, I experience it fully I start to smile.
At this point I am not quiet clear what AHA's I accomplished or not. I
am not even sure if I am done or not, but I am smiling like a little
child the rest of the night. I feel good.
I feel very thankful to you Ed and the tribe for letting me visit. I
feel inspired by you guys. I hope to see you again soon.
Follow up after the tribe:
I am quiet not sure how it is all connected, but here are recent changes
since my visit to incline: I speak more often, longer and and about more
important stuff with my mom. I work out very intensely and feel great
joy doing so. I feel more fun when I am doing things, whether it is
developing trading systems or picking up my dry cleaning. I am more
accepting and appreciative of other people. My relationship with my
girlfriend is more intimate, she also does much less stuff to irritate
me. I have a deep sense that everything is hear to help me, I feel life
is overloading me with things to help me, which I like. A lot of members
out of our tribe drop out and we merge with another tribe in the city, I
feel all members of the new tribe are very committed to the process,
which is awesome.
Thank you for your work Ed, great to meet you. I am hoping to get the
Quattro Passo (pass on all four snapshots) : ) |
Thank you for sharing your process.

Clip:
http://i13.photobucket.com/albums/
a263/likesharad/commitment.jpg
|
|
Wed, 07 Jun
2006
Ill Eagle In Migration
(Illegal Immigration)
 |
FAQ does not answer why questions or
tell people what they should do. See ground rules.
If you want an example of applying
the system model, you might notice our society (1) enforces a minimum
wage (2) provides many free services for people who live here and (3)
makes it difficult to enter the country and become a citizen.
Some people, who are very happy to
work for less than the minimum wage and who are happy to receive free
services, come here to improve their lives, even at the risk of doing
something illegal.
Result: a net influx of illegal
immigrants.
The result reflects our collective
intention. To determine if this is a good or bad result, you have
to apply your own judgment.
-----
Government programs rarely reflect
the inherent laissez-faire nature of man. They typically enable
societal drama that associates with societal k-nots such as surround
fear, greed and jealousy.
The "solution" to the immigration
"problem" has nothing to do with building walls or sending people home
to Mexico; it has to do with untying societal k-nots (Part of my
snapshot for TTP).
Absent these k-nots we would likely
dismantle the minimum wage, the welfare system and the border
control and the system
would find a new way to balance.
-----
Note: Government, in the long-run is
self-correcting - it always goes broke. (The current unfunded liability
for public school teacher's retirement programs is approaching half a
trillion dollars, and rising)

Building a Wall
is just more drama.
Clip:
http://republic-news.org/archive/34-repub/
34-images/34-illegal-immigrant-b.gif |
|
Wed, 07 Jun
2006
Permission to Change a Snapshot Category.
Of the four snapshot categories, Right Livelihood, Body, Fun and
Relationships, our group is trying to figure our where to put something
like spiritual / religious growth, dressing in nicer clothes, or other
things that a person might do for any sort of personal growth or
improvement.
I had suggested replacing Body with Personal, where Body (exercising,
losing weight, etc) would fall under Personal. What do you think?
I could certainly take my issue of needing to rearrange the process to
suit my needs as an entry point to my next hotseat (Hah! Beat you to
it!) But I have more pressing issues as entry points. |
I wonder if one of your pressing
issues is needing permission to do what you want to do.
Some folks hold their spirituality
as a relationship with a higher power.
Some hold it as a transcendent
process, observable as the evolution of your snapshots and as the way
you lead your life.

If You are Unwilling
to Take your Pressing Problems to Tribe
perhaps you can flatten them
with a machine like this.
Clip:
http://www.apparelmachinery.com/
hoffman/default.html |
|
Tue, 6 Jun
2006
Chart Server Questions
Hello Ed,
some questions on your chart server..
1) could you please tell me the time constants used
for short, medium and long term stock selections? My
lag calculations match yours almost exactly for short
term. Thinking this is a 5 day setting
2) possible to list out the lag / % yearly roc on the
chart itself?
3) Do you use cash flow to screen your selections? If
yes, what would this number be?
thanks a bunch |
I post the strong stocks charts as
examples. I do not recommend buying, selling, holding or staying out of
any of the stocks. I do not recommend any specific set of filter
parameters as likely or unlikely to select trades.
The filters are currently in
development and may change from time to time.
At present, you might be able to get
a pretty good fit for the short-term strong list by using a 5-day
exponential lag on price and screening for average daily cash flow
(price * volume) above $1,000,000 |
|
Tue, 6 Jun
2006
The Resignation Letter
Dear Ed,
I am writing to you to share a significant milestone that I reached. I
have prepared for this moment for almost three years, both mentally
(dissolving K-nots) and financially (becoming debt-free and having
living expenses set aside). In addition, there has been some “Under-Fred
network” phenomenon that went on to support my snapshot, I am not asking
why, I accept it as the flow of the universe.
I experienced my “October 2003 Workshop” snapshot “The Resignation
Letter” in the now.
My snapshot became real!!!!
There is nothing standing between me and my snapshot.
I have resonating feelings of accomplishment, satisfaction, joy and
empowerment throughout my body, which I enjoy feeling. I have a huge
grin on my face as I write this!
I also have feelings of fear of the unknown that come up and I accept
them willingly. These feelings have a positive intention that reinforces
the importance of following my trading plan and trading system. I feel I
am balanced with fearful and confident feelings.
I am an active Trader and that is all I want to do.
Here are the details of my snapshot.
I am sitting across a desk from my manager in his cubicle and with my
right arm extended towards him at 180 degrees. I am handing him a
resignation letter on a 8 1/2 x 11 sheet of white paper.
The Resignation Letter reads:
[My Name and Address and the Date]
To: Name
Dear Mr. Name
This is to formally notify you that I am resigning from [Firm] as an ...
Analyst. I am providing you with two weeks written notice. Friday June
16, 2006 will be my last day of employment.
I am choosing to leave [Firm] to pursue right livelihood which is
outside the realm of the corporate world.
If I may be of any assistance in training please know that I will gladly
make myself available to this effort during the next two weeks.
I thank you for the opportunity you've provided.
Sincerely,
[Me]
I want to thank you Ed for the priceless knowledge you share. I want to
also acknowledge my home town tribe for their continuous support. I
would also like to thank the various other tribe members that I have
come in contact with over the years for their support.
Intentions do equal results.
May God bless you Ed.
Yours truly, |
Thank you for sharing your process.

One of the Things you Sacrifice
when you quit your job
is quitting time.
Clip:
http://www.ssqq.com/information/
images/heading_quitting_time.jpg |
|
Tue, 6 Jun
2006
Broken Link
Ed,
Go to the link for Dec 11, 2005
and click on " Next ==>".
Instead of going to Dec 21,
you will end up at FAQ home page. |
Thank you for the catch. |
|
Tue, 6 Jun
2006
Irish Punt
Nice chart of the Irish Punt, trading this currency in the ‘now’ is
impossible, has it no longer exists.
One could trade it in the not too distant past; however, finding a
broker to take the order might be difficult.
Cheers |
Thank you for the catch. The chart
is pending removal from the list. |
|
Tue, 06 Jun
2006
Custom Charts
As an "Associate", I am now receiving custom stock charts which are the
specific charts ... I want to follow.
I am trading, following long term trends. Well ... still trying to. |
To receive custom charts, click on
Charts, above |
|
Tue, 6 Jun
2006
The Missing Link
Ed,
I could not locate "Studies" section on "Resources" page as per the FAQ
threads dated Thu, 2 Jun 2005 and Sun, 05 Jun 2005.
Thanks for your help. |
The studies section is currently
inactive. |
|
Mon, 05 Jun
2006
Time Space Continuum Rhetorical Question
Do you regard the consequences for what you do in the now if the future
does
not exist? |
Regarding consequences (in the now)
for your actions (in the now) is a good way to implement risk control.
The popular alternative, not
regarding consequences for actions, does not enable risk control.

Clarifying the Consequences
supports risk management
Clip:
http://people.wwc.edu/student/
davire/Consequences.jpg
|
|
Sun, 04 Jun
2006
One Hotseat to Relationship Turnaround
(My Chief asked me to share this.)
In January 2006 I was looking to divorce my wife of 5 years. Although I
had been a member of TTP for 6 months, it was the first time that I took
the issue of my marriage to the hotseat.
It was a good hotseat, but I
can't say that I got any great Aha's from it.
However the next morning
as I was reading I felt this great burst of love towards my wife. I went
in to give her a hug and expressed my intention to work on resolving the
conflict between us.
Five months later I'm happy to report that things
have never been better between us!
I've never understood how TTP works, why it works, I'm not even sure if
I send or receive correctly. But every meeting I go through the motions
and am constantly amazed at the progress that I've made in many
different areas of my life. It's like magic.
Thank you, Ed, for starting this forum. And thank you to my Tribe
members for their support and great receiving abilities.
|
Thank you for sharing your process.

In TTP, We Apply our Magic Wands
to our drum heads
Clip:
http://www.jeffthemagician.com/images/
imagestricks/mwand2.jpg |
|
Sun, 4 Jun
2006
Weight Up
RE: Final Weigh-In
Muscle weighs more than fat.
He'll surely trend either toward weight loss or weight gain ... but it
says nothing about his health or what he looks like.
It is possible to lose weight and at the same time have an unhealthy
blood lipid profile and a higher 'body fat' percentage.
The mirror usually clarifies. |
OK.

Putting on Lots of Weight
might be the healthy move
Clip:
http://www.cfreport.org/images/baby/baby1.jpg |
|
Sun, 4 Jun
2006
Trouble with Snapshots
Hi Ed,
I take the hot seat with several issues on my emotional radar but with
no focal point. The prospect of creating a four square snapshot brings
them into focus, so I concentrate on that. I can develop a snapshot for
Body but not the other three. The prospect of meeting my commitment of
providing a snapshot at the next meeting fills me with dread. With the
prompting of my process manager I curl over and hold my head in my
hands; everyone in the tribe encourages me by drumming and constant
vocalizations. I intensify the experience to surf the wave.
My hotseat seems to go on and on and on. At one point I need the
drumming to quiet down so I attempt to direct my receivers by a hand
signal. I am in CM for a very brief time. They get the message and I go
back to experiencing my forms.
After several more forms I feel exhausted so I lie down on the floor. My
process manager tells me to feel relaxed, to feel heavy. I comply. After
awhile I get back into my chair. I return to the snapshot issue. After
more forms and encouragement I reach a zero point and an aha emerges: No
matter what I can come up with for the snapshot I will have to work on
issues I do not want to work on as the result of next meeting's
snapshot. But that's fine; I experience the forms and enjoy them. The
same thing will happen in the moment of Now called next meeting.
Thanks, Ed. |
Thank you for sharing your process.
TTP can support your growth if and only if you are willing to receive
it.

Being Willing
has its moments
Clip:
http://www.joeks.com/archives_mar2003/
WeWilling.gif |
|
Sat, 03 Jun
2006
Wants to Invest
Dear Ed,
Please could you give me further information about investing with you.
I work as a doctor of medicine in the UK. I am looking to invest approx
$40,000.
I am keen to invest for the long-term. I appreciate that volatility is a
part of trading and have no problem with this. I have also read about
trend following over the past few years and can understand its merits.
Please could you give me an opportunity to invest with you. |
Some of my requirements for
investors are:
The amount you commit to speculating
must be less than 10% of your liquid net worth.
You must be willing to lose 1/2 of
that amount - and than walk away without financial or psychological
trauma if such a loss occurs.
In this case, if you have at least
$400,000 LNW and are willing to lose $20,000 we can talk further. |
|
Sat, 3 Jun
2006
Final Weigh In
The final weigh in this morning is 244lbs.
Thanks for your guidance and comments during this process. |
Hmmm ... I wonder what follows the
final weigh in. |
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Snapshot Experiment
One requirement for IVTT membership is to further develop the work.
Tonight I am experimenting with bringing an integrated four part
snapshot to my own tribe. It's one snapshot that integrates all 4 of the quadrants into
one image.
Image: My wife and I are dancing. I am spinning her out with one hand
while
I lift and balance a small platform loaded up with 2 5-kg weights and two
bags of money. My daughters are trying to dance with us. My son is
hiding behind a chair enjoying the spectacle and not wanting us to know
it.
Title: 'Cha Cha Ching'
Description: I am physically fit and financially independent. I sell
trader
support services to some of the best portfolio managers in the world. I
manage money for myself and a few carefully selected clients. I am well
compensated for the high returns and low draw downs that I provide for
my
clients. I maintain my balance and I'm having loads of fun dancing the
Cha
Cha Ching with my wonderful wife and our three children.
Feelings: I want to put a specific amount of money in the bags and I
don't
do so because of the workshop advice that specific amounts lack
emotional
content. I might take this into the hot seat. |
Thank you for sharing your process.

The Dance of Life
can include Relationship,
Right Livelihood, Body and Fun
Clip:
http://www.molndalsdansskola.se/
nyheter/j0233446.gif |
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Hello Breathwork Support Team!
As of June 1, 2006 I report that I complete the first month of trading
in my fund. May is a volatile month with performance up about 10.5% from
beginning equity at one point and down about 3.5% at another point. The
month ends with gross performance of about -2.1%. I raise a small amount
($62K) of additional assets in May, and assets under management as of
June 1 are just over $1.1 million.
I plan to attend the Managed Funds Association conference in Chicago
this month in order to introduce myself to institutional and high net
worth individual investors and to increase the visibility of my firm.
My fitness plan did not go so well in May. My weight is up about 4
pounds from my last report, as I partially abandon my fitness routine
while I focus on my business operations. Now that the fund is up and
running I plan to recommit to my fitness plan and get right back on the
system.
I commit to continue to report my assets under management to you, my
Breathwork support team, on the first of each month until I reach $5
million under management.
Thanks for your support! |
Thank you for sharing your process.
If you link business focus to
abandoning your fitness routine, your fund and your stomach may balloon
at the same time.

Putting on Weight
can indicate healthy growth.
Clip:
http://www.cdt.luth.se/~nanna/
tovah/birth/AUT_7284.JPG |
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Bear Market
Dear Ed
Magazine covers are a recurring theme in FAQ.
A bear has appeared on the front of the Economist.
Does the headline SUBLIMINALLY give its answer: i.e the picture says:
markets are heading down.
Or, shall we view this headline as being from the CONSCIOUS mind of a
journalist struggling for better ideas.
I think that if a 'theory of magazine covers' is going to exist then
this distinction is an important one.
Good luck as always!
 |
The Theory of Magazine Cover
Indicators is that vivid covers tend to memorialize societal abreactions
and indicate turning points.
In the case of a bear on the cover,
if that bear were raging, you might expect the decline to be near the
end.
In the case of a benign bear peeking
out from behind a tree, with an ambiguous caption, the cover might not
indicate much of an abreaction.
Such analytics are typically
delicate, unreliable and subject to misinterpretation.
Aside from that, the Magazine Cover
Indicator works pretty well, particularly in retrospect.
|
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Seminar-Cambridge
Mr. Seykota, (or Ed),
I mailed my registration for your seminar in
Cambridge today. After I mailed it I noticed that there was a
stipulation of a postmark date of May 30. I apologize, please except my
registration if you can or provide me any adjustments required.
You may remember an e-mail I sent you several months ago. I indicated I
was going through chemotherapy. I am finished now, living very much in
the now of each day. I have your Trading Tribe book and look forward to
contributing to the seminar any way I can.
I would like to share more with you relating to my AHA moments as a
struggling teenager, the genetic optimization program I wrote for
building portfolios, and a few other things, but I won’t burden you now.
Perhaps before, during, or after the seminar there will be a moment for
this, or perhaps not.
I have never traded a contract in my life, but I really enjoy
intellectually pursuing issues as if I were active. To that note, I
suspect this question may tread on your FAQ rules, but maybe not. I see
your diversification study. I see the single market scaling of contracts
with a specified heat of 10% and the diversified heat of 5%. What I am
intently wondering is if when applying the 5% heat factor for the
combined portfolio does each market get to draw from the combined equity
of both markets at an individual 5% heat factor, or does each market
keep its own running equity total for which each draw a respective 5%
heat from for sizing the contracts. If the answer cannot be a simple A
or B, I patiently await some supporting data for the diversified
simulation to complete my fascinations.
Thanks again, I really admire some of your frankness and insights. |
Workshop prices hold until I change
them. Your registration stands at the lower price. For the
latest prices, see the Workshop link, above.
The 5% heat factor means each
instrument assumes risk of 5% of the total account equity. |
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Risk
Sir,
What is risk? |
Risk is the product of the
probability of an (undesirable) event and the impact of the event.
You can learn more about your
feelings about about risk and locate and untie any k-nots you might have
about risk in your Tribe.

A Risky Situation
has a high probability
and a high impact
Clip:
http://static.flickr.com/29/
52461965_3978e2edec.jpg |
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Judging
Judging and Going in Circles
(5/17/06 Judging the judge)
Ed says, "Trying to be non-judgmental presupposes a judgment about being
judgmental"
(5/15/06 Going in Circles)
Ed says:
PM: So are you willing to do TTP?
S: No, I don't want to.
PM: OK, thank you. So let's have a check out and then go to the next
person
Dear Ed,
I think you are right on, as I have a knot in judgment, and the second
FAQ is a prime example. When I feel the sender is not really giving her
best effort (i.e. not willing), it feels like I am judging her progress,
and I keep telling myself that I need to be supportive instead of
analyzing her, and that whatever the sender does is the right thing,
even including what appears to be going in circle. As you say in the
6/24/04 FAQ (Why is trading so different), "TTP suspends belief in the
JCT trilogy: judgment, causality and time."
I notice you have a similar example in the Trading Tribe book when a
member's wife is calling for help to change her husband. However, in my
case, the person actually shows up at a tribe meeting, claims that she
wants to try, goes on the hot seat, but appears to be going in circle.
From a systematic view, I guess I attract her into this drama, and so my
best way out is to experience my feeling towards this "going-in-circle"
experience. Now, since we have only a total of three members (including
myself), so she is going to be either process-managing or receiving my
session. Hmmm, an interesting experiment ...Thanks. |
Thank you for sharing your process.

Attempts to Extricate Yourself from a K-not
provide the motive power
to drive you around the cycle.
Clip:
http://www.tobonline.com/ArticlePictures/
Volume84Pix/stop-guesswork.jpg
|
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Reframing
Trading from Guessing to Process
Dear Ed,
At our company tribe meeting (on 5/27) I work through on three forms and
reintegrate them to arrive at the zero point. The whole process is over
in
less than 10 minutes. A very simple and very powerful experience.
The first form is related to not knowing whether to sell or keep holding
on
as my open profits are declining. The next is related to feelings of
having
my clients (who are also father figures) second guess me. The third is
related to the "good" feeling of getting out of my gold stocks at the
top.
I experience in turn the shifting of tension from one arm to the other
as I
can't decide whether to sell or hold, and then doubling over a bit from
a
stomach feeling related to the second guessing from the clients, and
arms
fully stretched into the air like superman leaping a tall building in a
single bound for getting out at the top in the gold market. You
encourage
me to alternate the forms rapidly and let my body find the composite
form.
I find it and hold onto it. I let myself enjoy it and fully experience
it.
I take it to the tipping point and relax as I hold it even longer. I
feels
really cool. You ask me to get back into the composite form and really
enjoy it. I am willing and I go for it. I take it to the very end and
let go gently. I am calm and centered.
I realize that no matter how good my system is there will always be lots
of
things I could of or should have done better. When I reframe the trading
process as one of just playing the odds, it's clear that perfection
isn't
even an option. It doesn't matter one bit if I could have done something
better in retrospect as long as I follow my system. My task becomes one
of
developing and following a profitable system instead of constantly
making
the "right" decisions day in and day out.
During checkout I commit to going live with a mechanical system within 2
months.
|
Thank you for sharing your process.

Fundamental Analysis
is basically trying to guess right.
Trend Trading is a process
in which right and wrong
are irrelevant.
Clip:
http://www.tobonline.com/
ArticlePictures/Volume84Pix/stop-guesswork.jpg
|
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Transferring Dumb K-nots
Dear Ed,
The night's snapshot process has a clear theme related to feelings about
honoring and not honoring commitments.
On the hot seat, I have an issue with several self-deprecating comments
that
I make during the snapshot process. I get into the feelings and forms
and recall my father frequently insulting me and calling me dumb. I tell you
this and you encourage me to get into my form and say the word dumb over
and
over as I do it. I really get into it. First with derision, you're such
a
dummy. You dumb ass. Then with anger. You are so f---ing dumb. Dumb dumb
dumb!. Then musically. Dumb dee dumb dumb. Trying all sorts of
variations
until my form overtakes and I can't speak, I am literally dumb! I go
blank.
When I come back you ask me how did it feel. All I can say is 'really
dumb!' which gets quite a few chuckles.
You ask me if I am willing to do it again and really get into it. I
really
get into it with all the intention I can muster. During the process I
have
a vision. I am six years old, sitting at the table with my father and he
is
paying me for the grades on my report card. He pays me less than he
previously agrees to pay me. I point out that he owes me 5 cents more.
He
goes over the math and I notice that he is not paying me 5 cents for a
B- in
one subject. He exclaims: B minus!! That's almost a C! I feel really
hurt
and angry that he is breaking his agreement with me. We are now in line
with the theme of the night: breaking agreements.
When I tip I relate the vision and feelings to you. You ask me to get
into
them again. I end up on the futon. I smash my fist into the pillow over
and over again losing touch with all rational thought. Yelling at my
father
and letting out 35 years of repressed anger. I collapse onto the
mattress
and a feeling of calmness overcomes me.
As of today (5/31) I can report that my relationship with my father is
better. I understand better that he transferred the k-nots he received
from his father down to me. He considers himself dumb (he's definitely
not)
and his father taught him that he could never succeed just because of
who he
is. I remember him telling me the opposite many times: "a [family
name] can do
anything" and it was very clear from the joking tone of his voice that
he
did not believe it. Yet somehow by repeatedly telling me that statement
that he did not even believe, he made it possible for me to go much
further
than he ever could even while doubting my own worthiness.
With my natural abilities there are few limits to my success other than
the
feelings that I have in k-nots. I thank you and the tribe for helping me
overcome my feelings of unworthiness. I am able to dream dreams that I
could never dream before and I know that I am on the road to as much
success
as I am willing to accept.
|
Thank you for sharing your process.

One Consequence of Thinking you are Smart
is suddenly being surrounded
by dummies
Clip:
http://sandhill.typepad.com/
sandhill_trek/images/dumb.jpg
|
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Stretch
Dear Ed,
My issue relates to a comment from during the snapshot
process
that I am not stretching myself enough.
I go through a number of forms and eventually I end up on the futon in
the
middle of the floor stretching myself from the tip of my toes to the tip
of
my fingers. I stretch so hard then when I tip I feel pain in my
shoulder.
You ask me the positive intent of the pain. It's there to prevent me
from
doing serious damage to my body. To remind me not to stretch myself too
much.
You ask if I am willing to do it again and enjoy it. This time I
stretch out to just to the point where the stretch goes from feeling
good to
feeling painful. I ride that edge and enjoy it. My breathing stops and I
approach the blackout point. I relax and my head spins as I let my
breathing returns.
I do it once more with gusto and before I get to the dizzy point I find
myself up on my feet feeling like a conqueror. I let some anger out
toward
my father for tying k-nots and holding me back, punch the pillow and
then
strut to the couch all confident and filled with feelings of greatness.
You ask me how I am feeling. I say great. You ask me if there is
anything
else going on. I search my body and find a queasiness in my stomach. I
tell you I don't want to work on that one because I'm afraid I might
have to
use the ceremonial barf bucket. Are you willing to experience the
feeling
in your stomach? Yes, but I'm afraid. Good, make that feeling in your
stomach bigger. And sure enough, I eventually after a succession of
forms
end up on all fours heaving over the bucket.
I say that I am done. I am not, I have some things going on in my head.
During checkout another Tribe member says he feels that I am not done, that the
feeling in his stomach passes but there is something in his head that
did
not get cleared out. Very perceptive.
Later during his hot seat my head clears. Very strange.
On Saturday during our Company tribe meeting I commit to a heavy load.
One
that is far from easy given my other obligations yet still within the
realm
of possibility. I am better able to stretch. Only the next two weeks
will
tell if I stretch too much.
|
Thank you for sharing your process.

Stretching and Growing
go together
Clip:
http://www.teenbodybuilding.com/mark5b.jpg |
|
Thu, 1 Jun
2006
Comp [let->etit]
ion
Hi Ed,
It is great to see your new FAQ after a month! I was feeling worried if
something unfortunate happens to you that you are not able to maintain
it. (I don't know how that thought comes about) In any case, glad to see
your answers. This incidence reminds me of not taking things for
granted. I wholeheartedly appreciate your sharing. THANKS!!
In the 5/14/06 FAQ (Gas Price War), when you say, "While the chain
letter does not request government intervention (which tends to reduce
completion)...", do you mean reduce competition (instead of completion)?
Thanks. |
Thank you for the encouragement and
for the catch. |